"Let's get out of here!"

I was thinking about rain and how it's often lovely and I was thinking about Texas being hot and Texas getting rain and about how that's nice and about how sometimes we need the rain so bad but we can't make it rain.

Today a friend of mine that I grew up with came over.  She has a wee baby boy now and he's 11 weeks old.  She and her husband live and work in China but came home to have the baby because there were no appointments available in the hospital to have the baby.  We talked and I drank coffee and Beebs was in crazy mode and was totally fascinated by the baby.  It was so nice and it made me a little sad that she's headed back to China in a couple weeks.

Today Roommate scrawled a to do list titled "Shit to do" and put some things on there like getting the oil changed in the car and booking our hotel for Austin (!!!) and then he went to get the oil changed because he said it'd be nice to do things and then be able to "check shit off the list."  So they didn't change the oil because they told us we have a "pretty bad leak."  Joyous! 

I am obsessing over quitting my job.  I plan on finishing out the year there and then moving on.  There are people there I will miss but it's time to move on and I can still see those people if I want.  K is really the only person I'd miss a lot and she'd just be forced to invite me over to her house or something instead.  I don't know where to go from here.  I feel so lost.  Where should I work??  I also don't have a resume but that's not a big deal..right?  I mean, I can fix that.  I can create a resume..right?  I don't even know if I remember my jobs.  heh. 

There are a couple of little kids playing outside and I keep hearing "Let's get out of here!" and then a lot of running that fades away and then comes back, repeat.  ha.  1, 2, 3, GO!

September, September.

I was just reading the September 2006 archives.  I wanted to like..nudge that girl in those writings.  NO, I wanted to shake her.  I wanted to say fuck school, don't go today, tonight, you have to stay with him tonight, only a few more days, it's coming, you know it's coming but soon..sooner than you think.

We shall overcome.

We shall live in peace.

I've watched the Peter, Paul & Mary special on PBS twice now.  When I was a teenager I babysat this little girl that lived down the road from us.  She loved to watch/listen to PPM and Raffi.  Mary sure was hot when she was young.  Can I tell you that I hate this song:  "This land is your land."  HATE!!  I do love Woody Guthrie though.  One time one of my favorite bands, Waterdeep, was singin' this old Woody Guthrie song and well..it was just perfect.  At one point I loved playing that song on the piano, this land is your land, that song.  It was probably easy.  heh.  Hey there cutie rainbow guitar strap.  I do love me some folk songs though.  There is no denying that. 

I'm trying to commit to less job griping until I do something about it.  This month is my 2 year anniversary of working there.  For having never loved that place I'm pretty proud of myself for making it this long. 

Saturday was the 3rd anniversary of my dad's death.  I'm so pissed he died at the age of 50.  When I saw that Patrick Swayze died today of cancer I immediately wanted to see his age and then I think oh, he lived 7 yrs longer than my dad.  I do this anytime I hear/read about someone's death.  Oh, they were X years older than my dad.  Sometimes I just so painfully wish he was alive if for no other reason than to meet my daughter.  Oh how he would love her.  My memories and sadness vary about my dad.  It always hits me or comes up when I least expect it.  Saturday it was inevitable.  I thought about when he died and when I went there to see him, to see his body.  I forever have that image in my head.  It was unpleasant.  There's also a very distinct smell related to a cancer death.  That sounds nursey and stupid but it's so...unique.  Anyway, I cried on my short drive to work and yelled a little about how that last year played out.  It was just so fucking shitty.  So many I wishes.  On Sunday, Roommate's uncle let the family know that he has prostate cancer and has maybe a year to live.  Cancer is so greedy.

Any nurses read this blog and know the perfect job for me?  I don't feel like I can even focus my brain long enough to consider and I'm so new to this profession that I know this tiny surface scraping of what's available out there.  Endless variety and..I suck at interviewing. 

Groom's Cake ice cream.

I made awesome breakfast burritos the other day.  Told you already via Twitter - included roasted sweet potatoes/eggs/black beans/tomatoes/cilantro/salsa/cheddar.  Eggs from Mom's chickens, tomatoes, cilantro, salsa from her garden..sweet potatoes from K. from the lil' farmer's mkt.  Aww.  They maybe sound gross?  I don't know, I hate eggs but enjoyed all those other ingreds.

Today I roasted some vegs with curry, more from Mom's garden and a huge pan of tomatoes that I drizzled with a bit of olive oil and some had fresh basil and whatnot and afterwards Mom and I smooshed some up on crusty bread holy delicious.  Also I roasted some squash in that some oven.  I felt pretty domestic like multi-tasking in the oven. 

I need shoes for Beebs.  Hard to fit her feet in anything.  She's worn the same pair like always, the only pair, white sandals with velcro on the top so we can adjust over the top of her (squishy) foot.  So many I love online that cost like $40!  Sorry, Beebs, no go.  Also I need shoes for work SO BAD.  My feet are spreading and I think I have plantar fascitis in my left foot.  I'm serious!!  Am I 80?  What the shit? 

In October I'm off work for like 2 weeks.  It's going to be so wonderful.  We're going to bro-in-law's wedding in Texas.  Roommate is a groomsman and is wearing a tux.  I've never seen him in a tux.  We were both wearing pants/jacket at our wedding.  ha.  I was also wearing pigtails with mums tucked into them?  Um..yeah so anyway. 

I love fall.  I can't believe September is half over?  I've wasted half the month going "I can't believe it's September!!" 

If I were about 60 pounds lighter I would dress so cute!  What's my deal with that anyway?  Other chunks dress so cute?  I don't know how.

oh so excited to sleep.
happy tuesday and I hope you're wonderful.
thanks for reading.

This is how I feel before/during/after work.