About a dream.

Last night I dreamt of flying, being on this massive, crazy insane plane. I'm not sure what kind of trip I was on but it involved many people from high school. (oh here we go) .. We would land and do some things then take off..fly some more..land, etc. It did not appear to be a pleasure journey but rather one of survival. What I most remember from this dream is my relationship with friends. In the dream, 2 of my last remaining people from high school, one being my best friend since I was 7, was lost (or so I thought). I was in a panic, searching and on our plane I stood up and asked if anyone...ANYONE had seen her. I kept asking, searching. And there she sat in front of me and she looked at me, annoyed and said "Um. I'm right here." I was relieved but confused, why didn't you tell me? I've been looking everywhere!

Somewhere else in the dream I stumbled across a couple friends I thought were still living in another country and I asked, confused, when did you get back? They'd been back a long time. They didn't want me to know.

I woke up with that kind of leftover emotion that just sort of sits inside. I felt sad and abandoned. I'm still trying to shake it. The dream is definitely a good representative of some feelings lately. Through the life of this blog I've spent a portion of time analyzing friendships I have or..do not have. I still do not understand them. This post seems sad but I am perpetually in that place.